Two Journeys end

I've learned a lot in this few short months. I knew the marathon would be hard but I never imagined it would be that hard. Many times I just wanted to stop moving, but then I'd set a new goal. "I'll stop at the next mile marker or I'll stop when the bus comes to me" but every time I just kept pushing on. A few personal things motivated me but one thought kept me going. If someone with cancer can get up every morning and keep moving then who am I to stop. I was able to finish my journey and sadly the next day so did my husband's Dad, Bill Nowicke. He was a strong, funny, loving and one of a kind person. His journey with cancer has ended, but his spirit remains. I've learned in two short days to take life as it comes and make the best of it, no regrets!!

Never underestimate 26.2 miles

WOW!!! What an experience! That's right today was the big day, October 21,2007 will go down as an unbelievable day. We started out at 5:30am going out for a Team in Training group picture. By 6:15 we were walking down to the start and by 7:10am the race started. The past week has been very emotional and the whole thing was very surreal. I started running and instantly felt my knees refusing to run. I was in so much pain. I thought maybe it was just because I was cold and it would work itself out in a mile or two. One person passed me noting how I was struggling and I wasn't at the 1 mile marker yet. I'm sure I started freaking out but by 1 plus I made the decision to stop running and hoped to walk the kinks out. It felt really good to walk. I attempted to run again and knew instantly it wasn't going to work. I decided that I was better off walking as much as I could and somewhat quickly. I had a chance, keep my pace under 15 minutes and I could finish under the 6 hours and 30 minute time frame. I was trucking going a strong 14 minute mile until 10 miles. I started hyperventilating and I hit the wall. I didn't think my legs were going to move one more inch. But they did and I kept going. At 13 miles Bill met up with me and knew I wasn't doing good. He started walking with me, he really was trying to keep me in pace. Having trained the last 5 months to run, my body wasn't to happy with me. I was using muscles I haven't abused. By 14 the Team in Training coaches started to appear checking up on me. By 17 we had a coach with us. Bill wanted to know if I wanted to stop. Of course I wanted to stop, but my body kept moving. The bus came up at 18 and said get on you're done. I was done too, but I just kept walking. Then there were 2 coaches walking with us. I was in it and at that point there was no turning back the fastest way out was to keep going or take a short cut. One point I asked for friends to come pick me up, but I kept walking. By mile 23 there were 3 coaches with us. And I kept walking. The spectators had gone home, the course was broke down, the fluid stations were gone, but I kept walking. By mile 25 there were 8 coaches walking with us. I was the last one, the very last one. By the time I crossed the finish line, well where the finish line was anyway I had 11 coaches and an unofficial time of 6:50. Twenty minutes to late, but I finished. I don't really know what it was that kept me walking but I couldn't stop no matter how bad I want too. I didn't run, I didn't finish with an official time but I'm still very proud of myself. Bill for not training, he walked 13.1 miles today with me and I couldn't have finished without him. This has been my journey, I've found a power within me I hoped was there and now I know is. I finished my journey not the race but my journey. All in all we, my group of friends, raised over $10,000 for Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. We've done an amazing thing today and I've extremely proud of everyone of them for finishing their own race!

3 more days. 3 more days till the BIG DAY! If you've read my blog you know I've been freaking out about this since the very beginning. It's become a stressful event. (Who wouldn't it's 26.2 miles?!!) Stress that was only created by me. Well I'm here to say, "No more!" What's done is done. I've ran, I've stretched, I've been to therapy, I've missed big runs especially lately and I've hobbled alot. But from here on out it is what it is. I'm going to go out and have some fun. I'm going to go out and enjoy the people, the environment, the event...All the while I'm hobbling 26.2 miles. I like to think that I'm going to finish in the time frame, I'm praying I finish in the time frame. As for my postings it's been a roller coaster first I'm in then I'm out, I'm positive then I'm throwing in the towel. I've gotten some great support from family and friends. I'm glad I decided to write this blog and log the good, the bad and the ugly with a little chuckle thrown in. I've gotta laugh it helps with the pain. Since I've taken so much time off, I actually am starting to feel normal. I can walk up and down the stairs, I can bend my knees without winching, and I can roll out of bed without wondering if my ankles will support me. And here's a big one I haven't lost or gained one pound, but my clothes are starting to fit. I believe I truly believe my body has been swollen from all this abuse. I'm sure that will all change Sunday. And I'm looking forward to it. I hear you can track runners throughout the course online at the marathon website http://www.detroitfreepressmarathon.com/ . For all you California people the race starts at 4:15 am your time, that's 7:15 Michigan time. Wish me a fun journey!

What am I not saying?

Well I can tell you that I haven't ran since my long run! Yep 2 weeks since I laced up the shoes and walked out the door. I felt pretty good the following day and the next day was killer. My therapist took my inserts way. The company had to make stronger, higher ones because I crushed the old ones. Since I've gotten those back I worn my shoes around town only to find out they don't fit in my shoes without crushing my toes. I've since placed them in my blue shoes which my therapist doesn't like but they have room for my toes. Did try to dress and run then Bill announced he had the stomach flu and that workout was cancelled.
I feel bad many times because I just try not to talk about this whole thing I sound so negative. And let me say it again I apologize but it's become one thing after another. I was talking to a friend in the store the other day and I walked away so sad that I hadn't put a positive spin on this. She did help me to summarize this as a very stressful thing. Not only am I scared to go out and run again, what's going to hurt this time, but I'm stressing out. I would settle for a nice jog enjoying the scenery instead of always mapping out my run just to make the miles.
A few people I did talk to about this have said 1. You're in a tapper and not a stall. (o.k. agree I'm letting my body heal and I'm just going to go out there run and endure the pain the big day. Why continue to torture myself now?) 2. I said in my letter that I was going to do this flaking out thing and I'm still being held accountable. (The worst thing I expected to happen to my body was lose a toe nail! YUCK!! I had no idea my body really truly is not designed for running.)
So as the big day approaches I'm trying to rest and relax. I will be there unless it's really hot and humid, I will give it my best, I will run as much as I can, I will finish my race.
Because I've made a commitment to you and to myself. Next time I try to prove to myself I can do anything if I work hard enough and put my mind to it I think I'll try something non-physical.
Thanks for reading. I love hearing people tell me they actually read this!

I had a very hard week. On top of the everyday activities plus therapy and running 10, 12, 6 and 18 miles we've moved family members and somethings I'm sure I'm forgetting. I know I completely forgot to run a 4 mile on Sat. I just didn't have anytime. I wasn't going to run it at 10pm and wake up at 6 to run 18. Oh well. With everything going on I thought it best to ditch my big 18 mile plan to run a new path and I just stick to my sub. Yep I mapped out 18 miles in my sub! I ended up running a big loop 8 times and found a 2 mile path to and from my house. It was only out of guilt that I completed 18, but I only ran 15. I was in so much pain I walked the last 3miles, more like hobbled. haha Needless to say I was very disappointed. Good or bad my revised schedule from my therapist had 18 my big run and from now on I'm tapering. I'm very worried that I physically will not be able to complete the whole marathon. A few good things I'm counting on 1. I'll be running with friends and a mass of people, 2. I'll be running in a new area 3. it's only one time. I'm hoping this will be enough for me to push through it all. This week we're off to California for a little r and r, family and of course a little beach running. Get your miles in :) TNT will be running their big 20 miler this weekend. Good luck everyone I'll be thinking about you!!

This whole experience has proved to be a truly challenging event in my life. These past few weeks have been no expectation. I knew once school started getting my miles in plus getting to physical therapy would be difficult. Since I blogged last I was to complete 46 miles of which I completed 33. I was to run 13 miles Sunday before last but I just couldn't do it. I was at the point that I was just recovering from the last long run to go into another long run. My knees, ankles, hip and mind just haven't been in the race. I've even had thoughts of just completing half the marathon and calling it a day. But I know at the end I would never forgive myself for quiting early. We ended up downtown the day I skipped my run and oddly enough we ended up on part of the course. (We never go downtown.) I was looking at the course and thinking it doesn't look so scary. I could see the bridge and Belle Isle, there were a ton of people there. I know the excitement of the day will carry me though to the end. In the meantime I have to kick myself out the door at the crack of something because it's not dawn yet to get my miles in. I've even mapped out a couple routes to get the miles in and end at the therapist office. How crazy is that? I apologize for being in such a neg rut lately. You know it doesn't help when it's the change of the seasons and you have to bring out your old wardrobe and after all this running and cardio workout that none of your clothes fit! HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN? Not one pound have I lost or gain throughout this whole thing and my clothes still don't fit. It's so not fair.

I started the weekend out with an easy 3 mile run before a horrible and I mean horrible football game at Michigan. I woke up early and was out the door and back before anyone woke up. I don't like that we have less daylight. I really enjoyed waking up and running early. Now I look at the clock and see that it's still dark out and I just roll over hit the snooze. That's what happen to me on Sun morning when I was scheduled to run my long 12 miles. I finally rolled out of bed and got to the park by 8:30am. I started running and I realized I really wasn't mentally ready. I had a hard time the whole run. I covered 12 miles I walked some and ran most of it but I was really surprised that I finished in the same amount of time I have done all of my 12 miles. Even more surprising was the pain was minimal! My knees hurt but it was livable. I was shocked! Truthfully I was fearful of being in pain again. I decided Mon to skip the cardio and just run my 5 miles scheduled for Tues. with school starting it was just easier. Ssooo for running 20 miles in less than 60 hours I feel great! I've decided I don't like the treadmill or mile markers.

2 weeks! It doesn't seem like it's been two weeks since I posted last. Anyway we went up north with a group of friends and their kids. 5 couples, 12 kids, two houses, tons of rain, and lots of food what more could you ask for? The kids had fun. On to the running thing, I've been doing a lot more cardio which I love. I ran 4 miles before we left for up north. It was boring but I felt really good. I was shocked at how normal I really felt. NO pain! You gotta love that. Up north I ran 5 miles and then 4 plus another day. I was suppose to run 3 times but I just didn't have time one day. I could tell too that I was getting tight again. My knees started to hurt. I ended up skipping my Sat run and Sun I ran the 7 miles I was suppose to run up north. I haven't done any cardio since before we left and I'm hoping to throw some more in, it really is making a difference. Last night my sitter called and couldn't watch the kids today for my big 10 mile run that I was dreading. After her call at 8pm, I started to sic myself up and by 10pm I was in the gym on the treadmill running. All I have to say is I really don't like the treadmill. 10 miles and I was bored!! All they had on the tv's were talk shows and it's a little hard running and reading subtitles without my glasses. I found myself swaying from side to side. Or I would get so focused on my running that I almost ran off the treadmill in the front. Yeah you figure that one out. I like the great outdoors and the ability to run on your own pace when you want without having to push a button. So today my knees hurt and I can't wait till tomorrow's therapy. I purposely scheduled Thu, Fri after the big run. I had a feeling I wouldn't be walking too well. I don't run again until Sat but I'm going to try and go to the gym and do some big cardio this week.

I just want to add an extra note. For those of you who don't know I have reached my fundraising goal! Thank you to everyone who was able to give to a great cause. I also want to say thank you to everyone who has given me their support. It's been a challenge that I was ready for and not ready for. I wouldn't keep pushing forward if it wasn't for you who let me know that you still recognize my attempts, challenges and pain. Thank You!!

Finally

I was able to run on the path today. Yipe. I ran 3 sets of 1mile with 60 sec walk after then walked 4 minutes followed by another set. I almost did anyway. I forgot my fuel belt and it was too late to go back home to get it soo I did the first set of runs just fine. By the time I walked the 4 min and started to run I was thirsty. So after .5 mile run I walked then tried again at the following mile only ran .25 and walked. For the final mile I did run. So in total I ran 4.75 miles out of 6 and aside from being really thirsty I felt good. I have so much to think about while I run, my form mostly that I've found myself picking a few to really concentrate on. Hopefully after a few more times they'll become habit and I can concentrate on the others. Who thought running would be so hard? haha Legs feel really good and I can't wait till I get my inserts for my shoes then my ankle will stop hurting. Plus after not running for 2 weeks I fueled up on all the birthday cake from party after party that I was able to run 11:30 average!

Back in the swing of it

Got back on the treadmill today. I wanted to run outdoors but Bill thought it best not to run on the path just yet. I only ran two miles but it took a few to get the hang of it. I forgot the i-pod. What a bore! Afterward I jumped into the pool for a good 30 minute swim. I feel pretty good knees hurt a bit.

Update

So I'm off for 2 weeks and I know it's going to be hard to get back into the groove when I'm able but I'm still excited. A marathon I'll be able to check that off my list and move on to the next thing come Oct. 21. Until then I'm feeling much better. I can actually walk down the stairs one foot in front of the other. I'm not just laying around the house, I'm cross training. I think it's harder to do the elliptical than run. You've got to tell the machine how much you want to work, what type of workout, how much you weigh, how old you. And resistance? I just want to move. Then you have to hold onto a handle just so you can get a heart rate which it never can read mine. At least with running you just put on your shoes and go. Easy. I'll be back on the path soon enough.

Recommitment?

Sat. I went to the park to run only I left early, I was afraid to run 12 miles in the heat. Luckily Sat was nice and cloudy in the morning. I ran my 12 miles all of it with one bathroom stop. I was in pain, real pain. I actually added minutes to the time from my last 12. I wasn't happy with my run at all. The society sends out recommitment papers and wouldn't you know I had them in my hands. I've been fearful of the 26.2 miles I'm not sure why right now but by Sat. it was because there is no way and I mean no way I could finish 26.2 miles without crawling across the finish line. I kept those papers as long as I could. I wanted to just mark the no thank you box and put an end to this. I even thought just run a half marathon, I can run 12 miles what's another 1.1? Yesterday the paperwork was due. I waited so long I had to fax them in. I marked the yes I'll run a full 26.2 miles box but it wasn't till yesterday that I was really sure I could do it. I finally sought the advice of a professional about my leg pain. It was yesterday that I got answers, I finally know that it's not a "normal pain", it's more involved. It's all in my mechanics. The pain in my ankle, knee and hip in my right leg and ankle and knee in my left. I was in so much pain Sat I couldn't walk! Now I know, now I have answers, now I have a game plan, now I have hope. First step to the new plan? I have to take 2 weeks off, yep you heard me. 2 weeks to get all the swelling and irritated tissue back normal. I'm a little fearful about taking 2 weeks off at such an intense time, but I know if I don't I'll never finish. At least this way I'll be able to at least walk to the finish line. It's amazing with the race getting closer I'm less stressed than I was going into this. A serious weight has been lifted and I'm in it to have fun!

I'm here

It's been a week since I wrote in my blog. WOW. You know I'm not excited about this when I miss my entries. Were to start? I ran my 5 miles last Thurs. Don't remember anything to exciting about it. I was worried about running on Sat. 10 miles less than the week before but I was hurting enough I didn't want to get worse. I had a personal goal of 2 hours and 10 minutes and was able to finish in 2:05 including a bathroom break. I was excited and I didn't hurt too bad. Woke up Sunday in pain again and decided to skip the 3 mile run for a two day rest. Which brings us to Tues. I starting running my 5 miles and my ankles were not in it sooo I walked 3 miles instead. I had just a bad day on Tues. and I wasn't able to run at the time I like to so I wasn't into it at all. I was glad I walked the 3 because it seemed to loosen up my muscles that were killing me. Yesterday I decided I was going to really change things and I ran a new way for 4 miles. I didn't care about what my time was going to be and I just ran. It was a nice change. Today I still wasn't able to run at the time I like and it was hot. I pushed myself to run 3 miles and turned around walked about a mile to cool off. Then I finished my run home 6miles today run/walk. I feel pretty good.

I need to learn to count

This morning I had to run 4 miles and instead of running to the park I wanted to change things up a bit. I decided to run the hills today. The path as far as I know is marked for a 3 mile but I've never gone farther to see if there's more. So I decided to run a few .25 back and forth. I knew the end was a dreadful uphill .25 mile and after 3 miles I figured out I could just run another .25 mile and not have to run the uphill path. By the time I finished I looked at my watch in disbelief. I know I'm slower than normal on the hills but come on. I couldn't figure it out. When I got home I had to make a diagram in order to count the miles. Sure enough I ran over. Otherwise it was a good run. I saw 5 deer including a fawn. Plus I woke up this morning and the muscle by my knee wasn't tight. I don't know if it was the fruit I ate late last night or the Motrin I took for a headache but I feel a ton better. Yeah!

July 17

To my amazement I was able to roll out of bed on Sunday and that was about it. I could feel muscles in my legs I didn't think you had. My hips and my outer knee muscles are just killing me. I hope it's just something I need to develop. It almost feels like they are too tight. I stayed and stretched for about 15 minutes on Saturday because I could feel those muscle were tight. I keep stretching hoping it will work. Anyway I decided to skip the 3 mile run on Sunday and take Sunday plus Monday as rest days. Today really last night I was dreading today's 6 mile run. After the first steps I was ready to call it quits, but I pressed on. At 1 and a half I wanted to turn around and just make it 3 miles. Then I figured I was in the park I may as well take it to 5 miles and I could always walk the last mile. I don't exactly know how but I finished all 6 miles running. I wasn't worried about time, honestly I really don't worry about time I just wear my watch because I need to see if I can finish in the allotted time frame. I push a button at every mile but, I don't look at it until I'm walking my cool down. Once I'm moving, I'm moving I don't care about time I just care about finishing my miles. That reminds me of a story I heard the other day about two women at the Bayside or Bayshore race. They were so slow people kept trying to get them to stop , the race officials tried to force them off the course, eventually they came and took their numbers and shoe tags. The women refused to give up and said their goal was to raise the funds and complete the race. Someone asked what if no one is there when you complete the race, they replied that it didn't matter They were there to complete their goal. They finished 3 hours after the event was over and everyone was home. Then they walked home! Locals of course but good for them, they had a job to do and they didn't let anyone or anything get in their way.

I Ran 12 Miles

Yep... I ran 12 miles today. I'm soo proud of myself. There was not team training today so I headed up to the park anyway. Have you ever heard that athletes are the most superstitious people known? I don't consider myself to be an athlete, but I'm really superstitious when it comes to my running. I like things in the same spot, I like to run the same way, I like to get dressed the same way... Today I had to run around the park twice and I know I do not like the 4th mile in one direction, it's always been a hard mile for me. So today I decided to make a turn around I ran counterclockwise first so that miserable 4th was my 2nd mile. I was pretty happy about my decision and I also decided that I would turn around and run clockwise for the second lap. I knew that my 11th mile would be hard regardless of the direction I ran. Plus going clockwise gives you a nice downhill run toward the end that I thought would help me out because I can always run downhill. I could feel my muscles alongside my knees and my hips and I knew if I stopped I would have a really hard time starting up again. Toward the end there was also a gentleman what would walk/run and we were lapping each other for a while which helped me keep going. I wanted to complete this run in 2 hours and 30 minutes. I finished it in 2 hours and 31 minutes that includes the 3 minutes bathroom break. You know their not going to stop the clock the day of the race and say," so and so's on a bathroom break stop the clock." I'm incredibly impressed with myself and I'm sure I'll feel all 12 miles for the next few day. I'll be impressed if I can roll out of bed tomorrow.

Do Turkeys attack?

Odd I know but one of the last things I thought I'd have to worry about is if a turkey will attack. Went for a 5 mile run today and on the way ran right between two turkeys. One starting puffing his feathers at me so I slowed down then he crossed the path to join the other one. At which point I moved to the other side of the path clapped my hands loudly and ran quickly. Then looked up to see a deer on the path. I know they have attacked but I wasn't worried about that. It's funny how your mind starts to wander then I started to think about movies like birds or when animals attack. I continued on my run and just when I forgot about the turkeys and thought I was in the clear more turkeys. This time on the way home and it was a mama with her 7-8 babies. Being a mom of two I know that if anyone comes near my kids I'm on defense. Plus I could only imagine what kind of mood I'd be in if I had 7-8 kids of my own. I wasn't even going to risk that one. I just ran softly and fast. Other than the animals I had a good run, it felt really good 1 hour and 3 minutes. I found the groove quickly but I was tired and it was hard to stay in it. I found myself slouching a few times. I'm glad tomorrow is a day off. I need it. Sat is a 12 mile run and I'm excited. Funny I was scared to death of 7 miles but 12 miles doesn't sound scary.

Finding the groove

Went out for a four mile run today. Yesterday I finally purchased a fuel belt. I don't know why I was running holding a bottle of water for so long. I figured I start wearing it today on a shorter run so if it didn't work out I won't be stuck with it for 12 miles. I like the way the belt gives a snug support to my lower back. It has four water bottles on it. Starting out I did a triple whammy, I ran up the hill with the belt trying to find my groove again. Needless to say me run was slow but that's o.k. I finally got comfortable with the belt at the end. Finding my groove with the belt on was harder than I expected. I did figure out a few things: 1. without holding a bottle of water I'm less likely to drink myself to death. 2. I hold myself back when running downhill. I need to just go with it 3. I've been running with my knees! Finding that groove requires me to run from my hips. Which explains why my right hip has been hurting lately. So when the tush is flying I'm doing good!

I'm back

Let's see where did I leave off, I ran 3 miles on Weds. It was horrible. I had a breakdown just couldn't believe I was signed to run a marathon. After talking with Bill, I calmed down. I was putting too much pressure on myself. I didn't want to let anyone down especially Bill. I wasn't sure I could really run 26.2 miles. You know you can hear something a gillion times but until someone else says it, it really doesn't sink in. I was crazy scaried of running the whole thing, but I don't have to run the whole thing. I just have to finish it. I'm not worried too much about my time I only want to finish in the time limit 6 1/2 hours. Thurs. by the time I was able to run, it was scary thunderstorms outside so I thought it would be o.k. to skip which I felt bad about. But it gave me time to recoupe alittle more. Fri was a day off. Sat we had an early run time with the team, we met at 7:30 and had to run 10 miles. Half way through, it was way to hot. I know I didn't eat enough that morning to sustain that run and at one point I just kept walking I couldn't run anymore. I truely think I walked 4.5 miles, and I was o.k. with that. Finally I was o.k. with it. I finished in 2 hours and 18 minutes. People ask me how I did after the runs and my answer is always the same," I finished it." Because that's what I truely care about. Sunday I had to run 3-4 miles. I woke up at 6:30 and it was already too hot. So I went back to bed. I cheated later that day I went to the gym and ran on the treadmill. Mindless running I call it. I figured since I was cheating I'd do 4 miles on an incline and run as much of it as possible. It was good I finished all four miles with only one walk break long enough to swallow some water. I took it really slow too. Monday was an off day and I was wondering why my thighs hurt so much. That takes us to today. This morning I ran my scheduled 5 miles. I was doing really good too. I figured out why my thighs hurt on the hills. I was in a real groove. I felt so good I didn't want to stop and walk. I did have to take one walk break, I was starting to see stars. I was so bummed. As soon as they faded less than half a .25 mile, I started to run again and was able to run the rest of the way. I finished in 1 hour and 4 mins and was very proud of myself. I hope I'm able to keep that same feeling when I run the next time.

Back on the trail

Well after a good number of days I finally feel well enough to get out and run some miles. I wanted to run the 9 miles I missed on Sat. but thought it best to just run the 5 miles scheduled and let my body heal some more. It felt great to get out and then I started to feel bad again. I was having a hard time getting through the miles. I even took my walk breaks and had to take some extra ones during mile 4. I also started wondering again why am I doing this? Me running that's just two words you shouldn't see together. Almost had another breakdown but instead decided to just keep running one foot in front of the other. I often wonder if I can't get though 5 miles how in the world am I to get through the whole 26.2 miles. But then it really doesn't matter because I'll get through every mile, whether I'm walking or running I'll get through it! One foot in front of the other. I did complete the run in 1 hour and 5 minutes. No wonder I was having a hard time I wore myself out by running 12:36, 12:35, 11:32 with walk breaks!! That's fast for me. The lasagna I had for lunch wasn't helping any either. Reminder to self don't eat big meal even 4 hours before running!

Wed, Thurs and Friday

What can I say? I've been a bit unmotivated lately. I could tell I wasn't feeling good. I ran Weds. in the hot, humid heat at 7am and it was brutal. It was only 3 miles and I could hardly make that. I had to take at least 2 walk breaks. It was too humid. I'm amazed I finished in 39 minutes my best lap was 12:27 with an average of 13:03. Thurs. I had 4 miles and the weather was a lot better. Cooler without the humidity. I still struggled with what I had to do. I did finish and I had to use my walk breaks. I was nice and slow on the 1st, thinking I've been going too fast at the beginning and managed to have 3 more laps at 13:20. I thought maybe it's because I'm just not feeling inspired lately. If it wasn't for the financial backing I think I would have serious thoughts of not doing this. (I knew I'd come to this point. When can I quit doing this?) In running they call it the wall, I think I've hit the wall psychologically. My runs aren't that great, I've had some really bad one's lately, and my heart just isn't in it. Today is my day of rest and of course I woke with a sinus infection which I knew I was getting. I now know why this week was so hard physically to complete.

Need a little help

Had to run 5 miles today, what a day to have to do it too! 90 degrees and humid there was a little breeze but only if you were standing still. I had to run this evening I decided to go to the park in search of shade. I started running good, I ran 1 mile walked a minute, ran another, walked 1 minute. Then I decided to just go around instead of back at the 2.5 mile. I was slooowww, very slow. I just kept saying to myself,"I'm running my own race, I'm running my own race. Why am I doing this again? Oh, there goes a biker that was a nice breeze. I think I've seen that butt before. I'm running my own race. I think a snail just passed me!" I did finish my 5 miles with about 5 walk intervals thrown in there. Then I had a full mile to still walk back to the car. It was a nice walk. I came over the hill and saw the sunsetting with the reflection on the lake and a windsurfer gliding across (I didn't think there was enough wind!!). It was just beautiful and the song on the i-pod was saying something like we all find our way home. I ran my own race today, saw something I would have otherwise missed and that's why I ran today.

Sat and Sun

There was no team training this weekend so I woke up early and went out to run myself. I was really excited that I wasn't going to be passed by the team and I was able to run my own way. It was very cool out. I got my first 4 miles in and turned around to finish 4 more mile. Yep 8 mile this weekend by myself. I skipped most of my walk intervals I don't even think I walked 8 times. Every time I started a walk interval and started to run my legs were killing me. It was easier to just start running and keep going. It wasn't easy I'm not going to say that but I was proud of myself. I'm not running to win the marathon but I just want to finish. So what if it takes me a while to pass a walker or walker pass me. The point is that I'm completing my miles. I did finish 8 miles in 1 hour and 48 minutes that's 13:30 minute/miles. I really paced myself in the 1st mile and then was pretty consistent.

Today I was way too tired to get up and run and I almost didn't get out the door for my evening run, but I did run 3 miles. As I walked out the door I realized I forgot my water. I started to warm-up and just decided to keep going. I ran the whole thing! At 2.25 I really wanted to stop but I knew I had gone this far so why stop running now? I finished under 38 minutes! That's an average of 12:30 minute/mile. So by not walking I drop 1 minute. I still have a long way to go but at this point I'd be able to run 1/3 of a marathon!

Just another 4 miles

Woke up today tired and stuff. Wouldn't have anything to do with the 12 hours of sleep? I was so tired I fell asleep the moment the kids did. I knew I didn't want to run today especially after yesterday. I decided to take advantage of the short window and go for a run before Bill had to leave. Hoping to return in 1 hour and 10 minutes, I made it. I felt soo good. My best times were completed on this run. My watch wasn't able to record the info, but I remember seeing 12:25 for my last mile which I ran the last .5 without a break. I was shocked by my total time a little over 51 minutes. That works out to less than 13 minute/miles. Yeah me!! I know my first mile was in the 12's. I didn't see my 2nd and I know the 3rd was just over 13. I feel great too not to sore and my knees aren't bad either. Can you guess which way I ran? Yep the hill but it works for me. I've got to get a big incline in my workout, we do run over the Ambassador bridge and back through the Winsdor tunnel both of which are at least 100ft quick elevation. I'm so excited to break the 13 today and I'm also looking forward to a day off tomorrow.

huh

Ran the scheduled 3 mile today. When I run this one path my time is always slower. I thought maybe because of the time of day or heat. I was up early this morning and it was nice and cool. The path has rolling hills but I won't think that was the problem. I thought 3 miles was going to be nothing especially since mileage will be increasing during the week. I averaged 13:22 minute/mile and my knees hurt again. When I left this morning I felt great. I wore my pink running shoes, yesterday the blue ones. I'm wondering if it's the pink shoes. I'll have to experiment a bit more.

I like this

Had to run 4 miles today. It started raining the moment I walked out the door. It felt really good. I was worried about getting the i-pod wet but I kept going. I didn't pass too many people on the path. Guess someone forgot to tell them they won't melt. I decided to tackle "the hill" again. I don't know why but when I go that way my time is better. I averaged a 13:14 minute/mile. I was able to run the last mile without walking again. It's almost like I'm saving up to last the whole run. My knees started to hurt and they felt better when I was running than walking which helped make the decision to just run home.

Much better

I wasn't able to get out on Sunday and do my run. So this morning I got up early and ran 3 miles up "the hill". I did pretty good. I was very encouraged and I felt good. So good I skipped the last couple intervals of walking and ran the whole last mile. I ran average 13:08 mile. Not bad. During my cool down I had the pleasure of walking with an older gentleman on the path. I hadn't mentioned any of my difficulties but his comment to me about doing a marathon in general was you can only do your best and run your own race. I seem to be hearing that a lot.

What's happening?

Well were do I start? Friday I was scheduled to run, Bill had to go into the office so a morning run was out. I was having a garage sale to raise more money so a midday run was out. By the time Bill was home it seemed too late to go run 3 and wake up early for the team run on Sat. So I skipped Friday night. Sat I woke up scared to death, 7 miles scheduled. 7!!!! I had only done 5 at most. I went early walked around to warm-up. We had to tell everyone who showed up our name, race and pace. When they got to me they thought I was joking when I said I was slower running than my friends are walking. I'm not kidding they are faster. They made us start out slow for a warm-up (which is really my pace) then get faster at 3/4mile. I continued with my run 4 minutes/walk 1 which made the group I started with slowly draft away. Then I was getting passed by the faster group. Thank god the walkers went the opposite way I don't think I could have handled it when they started to pass me. I was doing good at mile 2 they handed out water and again at 4 at which pointed I just refilled my water bottle. Mind you I'm the only runner out there, not one team member in sight and at 4.25mile marker I don't know what happened. If it was the pressure from being the LAST runner, the thought of 3 more why am I doing this again, or thought of a recent open mouth insert foot incident but I just started crying which lead to hyperventilating. I've never done that before. I had to skip a whole run interval and walk covering my mouth with my hand and try to calm down. I swear people going by thought I had Asama. Even with that whole episode that mile was 14 minutes. I did finish the full 7 miles in 1hour and 35 minutes which in retrospect is not much compared to 26.2 miles.

I was reading one of my friends blogs and she started talking about how she's got a guardian angel running with her. I don't think she's crazy at all I sometimes think I've got someone helping me train. I think mine helps me in a different way. I think he helps to give me obstacles so that I will be prepared for anything. I believe he throws the worst at me because he knows I can take it and it'll make me stronger. I was thinking about my 7 mile run and I think at the hyper moment the one thing I was so upset about, I was alone completely alone. And I still finished. Yet another hurdle covered. Thanks!!

Where's my hat?

The day off felt great. I very much needed the rest. My legs were starting to feel like lead at the end of my knees. I had a busy day today. I worked on more fundraising. I had my first garage sale were all the proceeds go to the society. After a full day I still had to run 3 miles. By the time Bill came home I was ready for bed with a big headache and toothpicks holding my eyelids open. I said "Noway Am I going tonight!" Then I walked in the bedroom and put my running clothes on. I knew I had to go now or never. I did run my 3 miles. It wasn't in record time but I was out there and now I feel better. I'm glad I did go. Thanks Bill for the support and the ability to drop the kids and run. I know it's only going to get harder. Oh yeah and next time I wear my hat rain, shine or darkness. Not only is it a great shade provider but it's a good bug shield. mmm... protein

Shade

Hard, today was just hard. I'm very excited to have my day off tomorrow. I really need it. It was hot today. I was looking for any shade, "oh look there's a telephone pole that's shade." My average was 13:40. I'm beat!

Am I moving?

O.k. let me expand a little on yesterday's posting, I was running on a treadmill! Today I stayed close to home. I started out slow but I thought that's o.k. I'm on "the hill", it's a killer hill. I just kept looking at my feet the whole time thinking there's no way I'm moving. It seemed sooo slow. Then I decided to go a different way, I don't know how far I went the 2nd mile, but according to my watch I hope it was more that a whole mile. The third was better but I couldn't get into it today. My time was good for the two miles I know were miles and even with the longer one my average was 13:23. I'm going to tackle the hill again. It can only get better, right? Do you think they have a treadmill marathon?

Doing good

Went running today after the kids were in bed and of course the cake from the party. Maybe the cake helped whatever it was I ran 4 mile instead of the 3 miles scheduled. The last 2 miles I ran all except 1 minute. I totally skipped the interval 4 run/ 1 walk. The walk seemed like it was messing up my rhythm. Just when I'd get in the zone I'd have a walk interval. My average was 13:42/mile. I was sore after the 5 mile run and I feel better now.

Not bad

So today was team workout. Beforehand I was so scarred, freaking out. Once there I really didn't have anytime to think about that. They lined us up and away we went. Because I got there so late I didn't get to warm-up like I wanted and I'm a bit sore. I'm hoping that's the reason. I was to run 6 miles but I didn't want to injure myself since I've only been running 3 miles for a week. I ran 5 miles and as I was running wanted to make it shorter, but I stuck to my commitment and ran the whole 5. My average was 13:20! I thought that was great. My girlfriend finished same time only she ran 6 miles. I'm not hard on myself today. I think I did a great job!
GO TEAM

Can you say Treadmill?

Yep! I woke up early and went to the gym. I love the treadmill. Ran 3 miles, I worked on my pace starting slow and getting fast miles in. Averaged 14:20 minute miles, slow? Absolutely! I'm working my way to a faster mile not trying to kill myself. Just a little side note I've noticed my butt is movin' on up! to the top.

Not too smart

Decided to run today at my in-laws. It was perfect they get to visit I get a quick run in. Only it was 2pm and 94 degrees! Needless to say I only ran 2 miles and had to stop at the pool house to cool down. I won't be doing that again.

New schedule

Well my first day of training as a real runner. I ran 4minutes and walked 1. I went 3 miles and averaged a 14:33 minute/mile. Not bad for the first time. I bought a watch to help and I love it. The workout was right on track. The walks weren't too short and the runs felt good. I did slow way down the third mile but I'm just starting. I'm not going to be too hard on myself yet. I can't wait till Sat's training when I line up to workout with the runners. I'm sure I'll learn a lot yet again but I'm still excited.

we train - to accomplish our goals!

Thanks Coach Sandy for the inspiring words. I had to write to the Coaches and tell them I'm switching to running. A new workout to try tomorrow we'll see how it goes. I have taken today off. I've also been getting a lot of inspiring words from friends and family. I love hearing how this affects others whether it's from a personal point or just how they perceive my journey. It's all welcomed.

It's personal

Yesterday was bad, really bad! I've come to the conclusion that I'm not o.k. with walking this marathon. I'm signed up to run and as a personal accomplishment I have to run. Actually run. I'm not a runner, yet. What more of a reason or personal challenge than to run a marathon. I've been working off the schedule my friend e-mailed, to get you to run 30 minutes straight. I'm just scared it's not ramping me up fast enough. The Team is running 6 miles this weekend, if I didn't start running will I be able to catch up? I ran this evening. I ran just under 3 miles only walked once beside the warm-up and cool down. I felt good.

Hot and Humid or Humiliated?

Yet another humbling day. I stepped outside only to find it humid and hot already at 9am for the Team training. I thought I'd be good. I wanted to walk 8 miles. It shouldn't be a problem, right? Wrong! I started walking by myself and kept thinking about this article I read. I said that when doing long runs at least half should be a pace. I don't know why time is so important now. So I decided that at mile 3 I would walk 2, run 1 minute. By the time I got to the Team I was dehydrated, humiliated and just plain beat down. I had been gone 1 and 1/2 hours and only gone 6 miles! It took me 30 minutes to do the last 3 miles. You figure that one out. I felt horrible mentally and physically. I got my first blisters with some new shoes. This definitely isn't going to work.

Wow!

When I opened the mail today I couldn't believe my eyes. Someone is pledging $25/mile that I run in the marathon to my cause. That's it I have to run. I ran again today this time I stepped it up, ran 2 minutes walked 1 for 30 minutes. I could feel it this time. I was very thankful for the rain halfway through the workout. I actually was celebrating as I ran. I'll have to do this one again.

Having second thoughts

I've been worried about the time and the miles walking. With my knee feeling so good I'm thinking about running more and more. My friend sent out a schedule for those of us who can't run for more than 3 minutes without falling over. It looks very do-able. I set out today to start the schedule. Walked 2 minutes, ran one for 30 minutes. I felt like I hadn't worked out at all. I think I can really do this.

10 miles

Yep I walked 10 miles today. I got up early and stepped out the door. I walked into the park around and back. I feel great! My knee doesn't hurt anymore. I love my normal looking running shoes which took two days to dry from my last walk. And I was back in less than three hours.

Rocky!!!

Now I know what Rocky felt like. We didn't have Team training today so my friends and I decided to meet and train together. This time they picked me up and we drove into the park. It was sprinkling but rain or sun we have to go on Oct.21. What's a little water right? So we decided to walk 6 miles. My friends walked a way quickly and I was o.k. with it this time. I was going to take it easy, my knee was starting to feel better and I had on my new running shoes. Funny I went to the store to get running shoes whatever they had was good with me. Some ladies were fussing over the colors, I decided I was excited to have some whacky color. Finally it's my turn and the guy hands me a white, silver and pink shoe. I just started to laugh. Anyway back to Rocky. I walked about 5 miles in the rain laughing because I could wring my sweatshirt out every 5 minutes. I decided I'm not going to get a ride home I feel great. I'm already wet what's 3 more miles. By mile 7 it starts to downpour and I laugh even harder. Rain or shine. It was when I turned into my driveway that I decided to run on the deck and be Rocky while my husband and kids looked on. It was the best feeling!!! I walked 8 1/2 miles in 2 hours and 15 minutes.

A New Day

Walked 5 miles today. It was windy and cold. I wanted to stop and turn around so bad, but I kept going. I made it in 1hour and 18 minutes

First Team Training

Walked into the park to meet the Team for our first Team Training session. Yes that's right I walked. I hurt my knee like I thought I would and so I'm thinking I have to walk to whole marathon. Anyway once there we walked an "easy" mile followed by a timed mile. I was dying at the "easy" walk. Then the timed walk was fast 14:00 not bad I thought. Then we kept walking for 2 more miles. Half way through the first mile I couldn't keep up with my friends. By the end they finished at least .25/mile ahead of me. That was very humbling. Then they gave me a ride half way home. I think I felt worse for not walking home. My knee still hurts.

Here we go!

A Page from Kristie’s Journal

11:26 pm. Thursday May 10, 2007

Well I did it. I finally stopped preparing for something and just did it. I got up, got dressed and out the door to run. Yes that’s right, to run; anyone who knows me knows I would rather get wet in a down pour than run from the car to the store. What’s a little water anyway? I’ll dry. Well I’m not quite sure what to call it, peer pressure, or call it a lapse in judgment. Whatever it was, I, Kristie Nowicke signed up for a marathon. That’s right a full 26.2 mile marathon. Oh sure, I got to the meeting thinking that we were going to walk the whole thing only to find out that’s not an option. And there was no way we, even I, wanted to walk just a half marathon. So I signed up to RUN a full marathon. We walked away from the meeting talking about how we could still walk it and finish under the 6 hour limit. I have to say I was scared to death. What did I just do? WHAT did I just do? No really, what did I do? I think I was more scared walking out of that meeting than I was on my wedding day. Sure I could just walk away and never look back, just forget the whole thing happened. No one would think twice right? Wrong, I would. I would know that here’s another thing I say I’m going to do or even start and I’m never able to finish. So with the help of my conscious and my husband I was able to walk out the door tonight and go for my first run. I may not have run the whole time, but even that I was on myself about doing. I’m going to run/walk a 26.2 marathon this October 21st.
As I run to prove that I can do this, I’m also helping someone else finish their race. Whether it’s a researcher, a doctor, or a patient, I’m raising funds to help the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. In the end I know how scared I am about running, but if it helps just one person fulfill the dream of being able to cure, help, or even just sleep in their own bed, that it will be worth the full 26.2 miles. So as I sit here typing the letter I ask you to help, help to kick me out the door everyday and raise the funds needed to help others. I plan on telling every person I come across about my quest so that there is no way I can just walk away and never look back. But I want to take the steps in the right direction and keep on running.